Sweet Home Florida

So, tonight I'm sitting at home at my Mom's and watching Sweet Home Alabama. I can't help think about how much I sometimes feel like Melanie Carmichael/Smooter. When I come "home" to NC from my "home" in Florida, I just get right back into the swing of things without missing a beat. "This fits too." It does. Both my life in Tampa and my life in Yanceyville fit me perfectly. No wonder I love both places so much. The city girl in me LOVES LOVES LOVES the fast paced city life of Tampa, Florida. But the feisty redneck country girl in me LOVES me some Yanceyville too (or Amityville, as one of my friends calls it because there is nothing around except woods, trees and old abandoned barns and houses--just like in "The Amityville Horror" movie :-) )!!!  

One of the main reasons I feel a parallel to Sweet Home Alabama and poor old Melanie is the relationship department. I discussed relationships in my last entry. When I was 18, I met this guy in my Advanced Biology class in my senior year of high school. We were in the same lab group and I became quite smitten with him. But I was graduating HS and he still had another year left. I knew it wouldn't work. During the summer after graduation, I worked at the school in the guidance office. I helped all the students for the next year with their class selection. Low and behold he walked in to change his classes for his senior year. We talked a bit and exchanged phone numbers. Pretty soon we were dating. We ended up dating for nearly 5 years. We became engaged and lived together. He truly was the love of my life. But all good things must come to an end, right? So many things worked against us though. It just wasn't meant to be with us. We broke up. I was devastated. 

But I went on with my life. I was determined to. You never get over your first love--the one you've given everything to. And I didn't get over him. He became a part of me. I never forgot him and I often wondered how he was doing and where he was in life...and if he was happy. That's all I ever wanted--him to be happy. Even if that meant he wasn't with me. But, I digress. As I said, I DID get on with my life. I dated others...and I got married eventually. 

My marriage lasted for 4 years before I told my husband that I wanted a divorce in 2010. I don't think I EVER loved him....not the way a wife is suppose to love her husband. If I did, I would have moved heaven and Earth to make it work. My goal was to be married by the time I was 30. He asked. So I said yes. Even when we were dating I knew things weren't right. He always kept secrets and talked a little too inappropriately to women. OK. A LOT. Call me crazy, but when you're married and your wife is screwing you on a regular, I just don't think you should be asking other women to fuck you too. "Forsaking all others"???? I found the texts, the emails, the pictures....it was disgusting. But I thought it was my punishment for marrying someone that I truly was NOT in love with. I had decided that THIS was how I was going to spend the rest of my life. {SIGHS} We moved to Florida to get away from it all and to give it another shot. My idea. 7 weeks later, the asshole is STILL trying to hook up with other women. Don't know if he ever succeeded. If you're hiding your emails and texts, you're cheating. Maybe the penis did or didn't touch another vagina, but you're sharing things about yourself that you should only share with your spouse. You're cheating. "I want a divorce. I'm tired of living like this. I don't love you anymore. I want a divorce."

Nearly 6 months later, I'm leaving my apartment in Florida to run an errand and I run into an old familiar face. My ex from high school!!! What???? Why is he in Florida?! Turns out he had lived there since 2004!!!! Long story short (well, this one, anyway), we basically started dating THAT NIGHT. It's been 2 years now. He is STILL the love of my life!!! I'm pretty sure that I'm his too. :) We have an awesome life together now and I fully intend on marrying him just like I should have 14 years ago. 

I'm his Melanie...He's my Jake.......We have our own Sweet Home Alabama.....Sweet Home Florida. Love you, Baby. I will be home soon.